Credit: John Fowler http://www.lumenetic.com/
Over the past few weeks, I have found myself in a number of discussions focused on change and the difficulties people have in working through it.
These discussions have occurred in both personal and work situations and often begin with a ‘below the line’ comment – an expression of frustration, resignation, helplessness or impatience about what is occurring. This is generally followed with more negative comments that move into blaming others about what is happening and a real sense of not being able to do anything about it.
Much has been written about change (just ‘google’ it to see how much) and it is not my intention in this blog post to add another theory to the list. What I would like to do is offer a very simple way to recognise your own responses and reactions to change so that you can understand where you are with the change and appreciate the impact that it is having on you.
(In my next post I will share some techniques that will enable you to shift from your current position in order to see the potential of a situation, rather than continue to dwell in it.)
I am sure there are many descriptions for the ways in which we respond and react to change. The ones I find most useful are connected to Stewardship, a wonderful book by Peter Block.
There are two common ‘below the line’ responses to change, identified by Block as the ‘critic’ and the ‘victim’.
You often hear the ‘critic’ first: they are vocal in questioning and challenging the change (as appropriate or necessary) and can readily provide many reasons why the change will not work. They often fail to see any positive outcomes from a change and that often comes from their previous experiences of having ‘been there and done that’ – it didn’t work then so why would it work now?
Whilst the critic can play a positive role in highlighting previous experiences that haven’t worked and questioning the way that change is being implemented, we also know that their constant complaining can wear others down. This causes those others to give up on the change when they feel there is no support for it, and/or to avoid engaging with the critic – it is ‘all too hard’.
The ‘victim’, on the other hand, tends to become isolated and unresponsive as they can’t see a way forward in the change. They often feel that they can do nothing about what is happening and fail to ask for help as a result. They wish for things to remain the way they were and their language often reflects a feeling of helplessness, for example: “Why me? Why all this again?”.
The victim’s contribution can also be positive in raising awareness of the feelings and emotions associated with the change. However, we also know that the feeling of helplessness they demonstrate can cause others to give up on engaging with them (ultimately leaving them alone), to get frustrated and dismissive of their responses because of their constant ‘whinging’, and/or to work around them as they are already inactive or disengaged.
One of the more subtle ‘below the line’ responses to change is identified as the ‘bystander’ –the person who is reluctant to get involved. Their caution means that they wait for others to make decisions and take the lead, not moving into the change until they know it’s safe. In many cases they also believe that if they just ignore the change then it will go away and things will go ‘back to normal’.
The bystander can make us aware of what people are cautious about in a change. However, because they tend to get on with what they are doing and avoid playing a part in the change, others ignore them and/or fail to communicate with them about what is happening. This just reinforces their lack of interest.
In sharing these responses and reactions, my intention is to have you reflect on where you might be in a change you are currently experiencing and what the impact of this position is on yourself and others. It might also be opportune to talk with others who are experiencing the same change, helping you to better understand where they are with the change and to get some feedback on what they see you saying and doing.
With all of this in mind, next month we will explore how we can shift from our current position to navigate through the change effectively and positively.
